What wine would these NBA players be?

I love wine. That’s a given. I mean I work for a wine company. But being the Renaissance man that I am, I refuse to be placed in your small, narrow-minded box SOCIETY! I like other things too. For example, I love basketball. And I really love terrible puns. The worse the better. With such a complex assortment of interests I guess you could say I’m pretty much a modern day Leonardo da Vinci (or a present day Leonardo DiCaprio).

So in an attempt to combine my three favorite things and mess around on Photoshop and call it “work,” I will now answer the age-old question: What wine would these NBA players be?

SAUVIGNON BLANC GRIFFIN

Vintage: 2009

Notes: Energetic, love-hate reaction, fresh

Grown in sunny California, the surprisingly energetic and fresh 2009 Sauvignon Blanc Griffin jumps right out of the glass. Like many Sauv Blancs, the ’09 Sauvignon Blanc Griffin has a love-hate relationship with consumers, but this wine has been slowly gaining fans across the country with its maturing and more refined style.

CARMERLOT ANTHONY

Vintage: 2003

Notes: Smooth, versatile, full-bodied

The 2003 CarMerlot Anthony is one of the most versatile wines on the market. Its dexterity allows it to pair well in almost any situation. While the popularity of CarMerlot has begun to wane, the smooth finish and full-bodied profile of the ’03 CarMerlot Anthony places it firmly in the upper echelon of wines.

DERRICK ROSÉ

Vintage: 2008

Notes: Light, vibrant, zippy.

Explosive, vibrant, and youthful are the first words that come to mind when taking in the 2008 Derrick Rosé. This light and zippy Rosé is sure to crossover your taste buds and leave your head spinning with delight. Recent vintages of the Derrick Rosé have been shelved, but its 2016 version looks to be rounding into form.

CABERNENÊ SAUVIGNON

Vintage: 2002

Notes: Big, Intriguing, prefers warm climates

The unorthodox 2002 CaberNenê comes from the warm slopes of Brazil. Best described as big and bold, the ’02 CaberNenê is still a bit of a mystery as it has yet to reach its full potential. Underrated or overrated? You be the judge.

Want to join in the fun? Load up your pun guns and shoot me any other hilarious basketball/wine puns you can think of to @drinkuproot. Include the hashtag #NBAWinePuns.

Cheat Sheet:
1. Sauvignon Blanc + Blake Griffin
2. Merlot + Carmelo Anthony
3. Rosé + Derrick Rose
4. Cabernet + Nenê

Note: All pictures modified by Matt with approval from Keith Allison

Bummer!

Looks like you are not 21 yet, enjoy your youth and come back to visit when you are.